The Facts of Life — part I

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My daughter and I were driving around the countryside with the twins — aged about five at the time — in the back, when one of them, with its unerring eye, spotted a cow with blood on its bottom.

“Look! Look! That cow’s bleeding!”

We ignored it.

“Did you see? That cow? It’s bleeding! Is it hurt?”

My daughter and I looked at each other.

“This is your territory,” I said firmly.

She rolled her eyes before launching into a lengthy, age-appropriate talk about birds and bees and periods and babies and remember we talked about that girlfriend’s dog who was ‘on heat’ and ALL female mammals including you darlings when you grow up etc etc.

There was a LOOOONG silence in the back.

We braced ourselves.

A small voice piped up:

“Even giraffes?”